Happy's First Blogification!

Saturday's ride Around the Bay was epic!

The weather was just about perfect, although some would have called it hot. With the lower humidity, this rider thought it was fantastic. And with the northwest wind across Garcon Point Bridge, man I was loving life. However, not everyone would agree with me. There was carnage a plenty!

The group started out from Firestone and Summit under partly sunny skies and moving along in the upper teens as we headed towards the first obstacle, The Causeway to Pace. Several of the boys were feeling frisky as we moved across, but none more than Aero Jim Britnell, who seemed to have the bit between the teeth as if we were just finishing the ride instead of starting it. He opened up his toolbox of suffering and pulled out the biggest wrench he could find to do some tweaking on the peloton's level of pain...into the high 20s. Here's where the carnage began.

Once in Pace itself, we made our way over to the second obstacle of the day, The Hamilton Bridge Road. The pace remained in the low 20s until the downhill section where it moved into the mid 30s and the high tempo carried unto the uphill portion of this day's proceedings. In fact, Circle K, Neil "Big Guns" Geci, Big Motor, Crusher and the Vortex romped and stomped up this 1 mile climb at over 20 mph! Uh, here's where more carnage became evident.

In fact just past the top of the climb but before the first of two rest stops, Harland "Happy" Williams flatted. We all waited for quite some time at the stop, but no Happy. Finally, after filling the bottles, Circle K and Vortex headed back in search of the unhappy Happy. They found him no more than 500 meters back fussing with his hand pump and his half inflated rear tire.
Here's his report in his own words:

OK, so there hanging in my closet was my blue Tour of California jersey. I hesitated when I reached for it this morning. The last time I wore it I flatted on the group ride. Nah, my rational side told me. Don’t be superstitious.

So, my day of mechanical challenges began.

First of all somewhere on the bridge to Pace the top to my water bottle abandoned the ride unbeknownst to me. On Hamilton Bridge road I had a flat. No biggie, right? I changed the tube but couldn’t get that sucker to inflate beyond about 40 pounds, bad valve I think. At the Tom Thumb I told Bob and Chip to proceed without me (the group had moved on by this time) and called for my wife to pick me up. Meanwhile I noticed my brake pad was loose so I broke out my toolkit.

Once I got home I changed the tube and the tire was good to go. So . . . I figured I would ride the reverse route and meet the group somewhere between Midway and Gulf Breeze. I rolled out onto Scenic Highway. Just before Scenic and Wimbledon my wheel began to clack with every revolution. I pulled over. Dang if I hadn’t picked up an inch long piece of 20 gauge electrical wire. It was sticking out perpendicular to the tire. Of course when I pulled it out the remainder of my air whooshed out with it. Another call to my dear wife (who was feeling like a Triple-A employee by this time) for a pickup. Yes, I could have changed it on the side of the road but I was a whopping 1 mile from home and little bit un-HAPPY at this point.

PS When I got home I fixed the tire(again) and continued to ride until I was once again. . . Happy.Sorry I missed Garcon Point Bridge. I hope everyone made it home before it got too hot.

Now, when the three (Happy, Circle K and Vortex) returned to the rest stop, they discovered the entire peloton had already departed without them for parts south. The three amigos were absolutely stunned and none said a word except Circle K, who simply uttered, "Wow!" With no Happy success and he deciding to call Mrs Happy for a lift to the Happy residence, Circle K and Vortex decided on a short cut down Glover and through the backdoor to Bagdad in hopes of catching up to the peloton. These two chasers hammered it along in the mid 20s hoping to bridge the gap by Robinson Point Road.

By the time the two had reached Avalon Blvd, they had not caught the group and determined they must now be in front of the bunch. As they reached the top of the hump on the Garcon Point Bridge, they stopped for a hard look ahead as well as behind. They could see no one in either direction and therefore reasoned that they were either way ahead or way behind the peloton. As they peered one last time behind them, they thought that maybe they could make out a rider or two more than a mile away. It wasn't until they arrived at the second rest stop and after several minutes realized that somehow they had gotten in front of the group, which was now strewn over several miles of the course.

All regrouped at the second rest stop as everyone it seemed had stories to tell of their own personal world of pain. Everyone tanked up and within a few minutes we were off for the final section of this epic ride which is the Around the Bay Loop. Right out of the gate, Big Guns took us into Anareobiaville, doing his version of a suicide pull...all the way to Andrews Institute. Beastly! (more carnage) This small group of Big Guns, Mike "Legs" Larson, Circle K, Big Motor, Vortex and Ranoldo slowed through Proper allowing several of the boys to latch back on just before the final crux of today's event...The 3 Mile Bridge. The pace stayed in the mid 20s until the hump, which caused the group to keep it in the high 20s until the Vortex flatted with just under a mile to go. Several stopped with him as some watched the motorists and others enjoyed the view.

A few minutes later they are all standing under the tree at Fish and Wildlife telling stories of one of the best rides in quite some time. Great ride with a great group of riders!

If you missed it, don't fret yourself, the WERAD is only two days away! Come on out and enjoy some suffering with the cast of unusual characters that can only be the Firestone and Summit peloton! Until then...

See you out on the road,
Bob

Left Lane Adds Some Color

Since I was "out of pocket" the last few days, as indicated in the blogification below, the Left Lane has taken it upon himself to offer his unique view...from the Left Lane, of this past WERAD.

That Left Lane, you gotta love him...not!

Here's his color commentary:

Seeing as you have shucked your Bloginator responsibilities while you "wasted away in Margaritaville", I figured I would offer up a commentary on this weeks WERAD as best I can remember it.


Great WERAD as usual. Not a huge turnout but many of the usual suspects. Attendees included Bob (Vortex), Richard (Left Lane/Me) Mark (The Thrill) Brill, Prenti the Older, Chuck (The Bad Half/Gramps), Isthvan (The Count of Monte Fishbone), Mark (The Big Hoagie) Calvert, Keith (The Big Motor), Nathan (The Nathan Bomb), David (The Bad Mayonnaise), Half Ride Dave Carroll (Lawman), Chris Huffman (The Real Lawman), Nestor (no nickname yet and fairly new to the group...Nestor was the only rider other than myself who showed up for Tuesday's ride.. he rode really well that day and I was able to convince him to come out and WERAD with the boys. Hope I got everyone..If I didn't..Live with It!!

We did our usual loop with Prenti doing most of the work early and keeping the pace fairly reasonable. On our first pass up Langley the pace kicked up as usual as we cruised through the park area noting the Traffic Enhancements had been removed (so I guess cyclists do have a little pull around here!!!). We were doing over 20 here and then up in the upper 20's as we hit Spanish Trail and headed for the Crit. Vortex took the lead through the Crit as usual with Left Lane on his wheel (What a Clydesdale Draft/Vortex for the others to follow) and put down a hot pace all the way through the course with Left Lane scooting around Vortex & Fishbone (who seemed disinterested), to get to Spanish Trail first (I have to get my sprint points where I can knowing I will get stomped on the final sprint!!)

We had the usual Hammerfests on the long straits on the other side of 9th Avenue and Burgess where we were cruising behind the Vortex in the upper 20's when we came to a quick slowdown as we saw a new stop sign with the Word "NEW" above it (stopping Burgess traffic!!) about halfway down the long straight. What a crazy place for a stop sign!! We rolled through at a slowed down pace and continued on our way grumbling about those damn traffic engineers who need to find something better to do than clog up our favorite straights!!...I guess its better than speed bumps!!!

Vortex and Left Lane got a little ahead of the group as we reached 9th Avenue perhaps planning a 2 man break but the lights were not favorable and everyone was together with the exception of the Bad Mayonnaise who we could see up ahead playing rabbit as we sat at the light. Half Ride Dave Carroll who got a late start joined us at the light as well. Well Dave went to the front as we started up Langley and put the hammer down as usual. We were in the mid 20's as we finished the slight uphill near the park and just accelerated from there. Dave was leading with Vortex, Big Motor Keith, Left Lane and Bad Half Chuck in the lead group with the others missing the wheel. Vortex took over as we headed to Spanish in the 30 mph range. As we turned onto Spanish he pulled over and incited us to send someone to the front to keep our small group ahead of the others, but we were all a bunch of toasted "Refusers". So the pace slowed down and the rest of the riders rejoined as we started down Maygarden.

I think Dave Carroll did the first pull with Mark The Thrill doing a short pull thereafter as we headed toward the Air Terminal gobbling up rabbit Dave in the process. As usual the selfless Big Motor Keith went to the front to do the "suicide pull" toward the finish. Pace was up over 25mph as we went through the Esses with the Big Motor Cranking it out. Around 400 yards from the finish, Left Lane broke to the front for the lead out and kicked it up into the upper 20's leading for a couple 100 yards just waiting to get stomped by the big sprinters. Sure enough around 100 yards from the finish here comes the Vortex (with that big gear up in the mid 30's) blowing by me. I sat up and just watched as Bad Half Chuck & The Thrill went by for 2nd & 3rd as well with Left Lane taking 4th and then the others rolling in. I guess I will have to get one of those little concealed motors from Coolio if I ever want to prevail on the final Maygarden Sprint!!

Anyway it was a great ride and we had a nice group slamming it down Scenic Highway as well to finish up the ride.

See everyone on the road Saturday morning. Rumor (and the Weather Channel) has it that the Gargoyle Point Bridge will be defanged on the Around the Bay ride...Wind out of the Northwest .. thank goodness!! Old Clydesdales with bad knees (ME) have been known to struggle into the usual 15mph headwind on this bridge.

The Left Lane

Thanks for the write up Left Lane!!! See you and everyone else tomorrow morning for the fabulous Around The Bay Loop! As always there should be plenty of peloton antics to go around for all...from the cast of unusual characters which is the Firestone and Summit Group!

Until then...

See you out on the road,
Bob

It May Be Hot, Hot, Hot...

...tomorrow morning's ride anyway!

Hey, sorry for the lack of blogulations this week. I have been out of pocket. The uh, lovely Mrs Graves and myself took some time at the condo on the beach. Gorgeous! The weather was perfect and the water, as always, absolutely beautiful! So, I wasn't really thinking about a bunch of sweaty bike riders.

Our condo is just across the street from Margaritaville Beach Hotel, so we head over on occasion for a Cheeseburger in Paradise. Hey man, "it's Five o'clock somewhere." Yep, nothing like a little change in latitude, change in attitude to refresh the soul. (Alright, I'll stop with the Jimmy Buffet songs)

We did see some fins to the left, fins to the right...

I know, enough already!

Now, regarding tomorrow's ride; Around the Bay Loop, it will be getting hot around mid to late morning. The forecast is for 90 degrees by 11am. However, it is calling for much lower humidity levels, 40 to 50% range. Here's some more good news, nice breeze out of the northnorthwest so the usually tortuous Garcon Point Bridge should be a pleasure with a nice tailwind. The 3 Mile Bridge might be another story though...but by then we're home.

Regardless, we need to start on time and move through our rest stops quickly. It will be important not to be riding any longer than need be, considering the forecast. Remember to drink plenty of fluids along the way. Don't wait to tank up at the rest stops, that's way too long between hydrations. Also, if you are waiting until you feel thirsty, you have waited too long. Drink before you feel the need. Keep topped off!

Tomorrow's route we have ridden probably a dozen times. It is about 60 to 65 miles long and has it all; flats, hills, 8 bridges and many miles of quiet roads. There's plenty of horsepower in the peloton to keep us moving along at a good pace and get us home before it gets too hot. So, the only variable is hydration. Please keep that in mind as we head down the road. Don't want you to be, "...wasting away again at the back of the pack...searching for your lost energy bar...some people say that he didn't hydrate enough...but I know, it's always Coolio's fault!"

Sorry, those Jimmy Buffet tunes really stick in your head.

See you in the morning! Until then...

See you out on the road,
Bob

A Word About Tomorrow

Tomorrow morning we will be doing a practice run of the Pensacola Cycling Classic road race course. This course is one of three stages that we will race four weeks from tomorrow. It's hard to believe it is already time for the race again. This year will be a bigger event than last year's inaugural race. I think we had over 340 riders last year! The only real change of note to this year's race is the location of the time trial stage. This year we are starting it in East Park on Pensacola Beach. This is the big parking lot about a mile east of Portofino. The time trial will be one way heading east on the Navarre Beach road for 5k. (3.1mile) The criterium course will remain the same in downtown Pensacola on Sunday morning.

So, tomorrow morning we will leave the Trailhead behind Truly Spokin' in Milton at 7:30am and cruise out to the course. The ride out to the start/finish is about 15-16 miles. The road race course is 40k (25miles). We will have two rest stops to fill the bottles and tell stories. The total miles for our loop is about 56 miles. We will be taking a different route back to Milton. Should be a fantastic ride! Weather forecast is for some overcast and temps in the 80s. The clouds will be a welcome addition compared to last year's cooker.

I have a few of my Senior Olympian buddies coming over from Destin and parts east to ride with us. I raced with some of the guys last year in Pensacola and this year in Mississippi. Great guys and strong riders. In fact, Jim Convey is a time trial champion from several States and Fred McLaughlin won the General Classification in last year's PCC as well as placed in the top ten in the National Senior Olympics in Houston in June. Both won their age groups in MS. It will be great riding with them again! After the ride we may look to do lunch somewhere with them if you are interested let me know. They have stories to tell.

Also, we will have a "recovery ride" Sunday afternoon at 3pm at Firestone and Summit. This easy spin ride will probably be around 20 to 25 miles and incorporate one stop somewhere. Regardless, should be just what the legs ordered after a fairly difficult effort on Saturday. Come on out!

See you in the morning and as always...

See you out on the road,
Bob

Great Rides This Past Weekend

This past weekend we had two great rides. On Saturday, the group did one of our all time favorites, The Twisted Hammock. We started out under sunny skies with a smaller than normal peloton. Although small, it got even smaller once we hit Beulah. Four of the original eleven turned back stating varying reasons. The surviving seven soldiered onward into the Hammock. (It's much easier to get into the hammock than it is to get out.) Crusher and Danamal were later overheard to say the pace was disappointingly slow. So, Crusher took up the gantlet and pushed the pace until about 1k to go. Then Aero Jim Britnell who was looking fitter than ever led the group to the line in a blistering pace. The Hammock Sprint was won by the Vortex who dedicated the victory to the MIA Gianni Bugno. Evidently, Aero wasn't getting enough exercise, because he was seen by the group riding back down into the Hammock as they rode out of the Hammock. Whaaat?!

The Bad Mayonnaise, Doug "The Devastator" Gehman and others took the shorter route after the first rest stop while Crusher and the Vortex opted for the longer miles. All were back together at the second rest stop just in time for the Vortex to be assaulted by an old crusty curmudgeon masquerading as a retired Marine. Crusher almost, uh...crushed the cranky codger as the other six riders circled ready for a throw down with a hapless has-been. It wasn't a pretty scene. (We still aren't sure what the, uhhh...gentleman's issue was. Maybe he was having another bad day. Maybe he just hates life.) Regardless, we headed down the road without incident...thankfully!

We rolled on around to Maygarden and back to the start line. Great ride! I had 61 miles as I was pulling into the garage.

Sunday was the Full Moon Ride. And want a fantastic ride it was! We had close to 20 riders of all talents and abilities. The sunset on the way out to the Fort was gorgeous as advertized. The Full Moon was equally beautiful over the Gulf for the ride back. Bad news though: Not a single meteor spotted. We even stopped along the way back hoping to see a couple of the shooting starts...nada. (That's Spanish...means nothing.) We did have two flats though. Wheelmen Matt flatted just before the second campground on the way back. We all stopped. As we are waiting, a couple of the more talented brethren amongst us began singing tunes from the 70s and 80s. At one point, one of the wannabe rockstars hit a high note and Chris Norton's front tire blew!!! That's right, while she was just standing there in flatted! The fans went wild!

Semper Cy, being the good kind of Marine, (is there any other? Uh, read story above) repaired it quickly and just in time as the fixers of Matt's flat showed up. The group, now all back together headed for home with no other events to share in this report. Great ride!!!

And speaking of great rides...tonight is the WERAD! That's right, 5:30pm at Firestone and Summit. Come on out! It looks to be a beautiful evening! See you then! And...

See you out on the road,
Bob

Full Moon Ride Tonight...with a Twist!

Just a quick note to remind everyone riding tonight on the beautiful Full Moon Ride; please remember to bring $3 for entrance into the Fort Pickens National Park. We usually have enough annual pass holders to get everyone in "free" however sometimes we don't and you may need to pay for yourself. Also, please bring your lights! There are very few cars on Fort Pickens Road at night, but there are a few. Lights are a must. They don't have to be the big fancy, light up a stadium type, but just something on the front and rear of your machine to let others know where you are.

We start as promptly as possible at 7pm tonight and ride to the Fort as the sun is setting. We have a few minutes to regroup at the Fort before heading back under the gorgeous full moon over the Gulf! This is a fantastic ride and one that everybody does more than once! (kinda like Lay's potato chips) you just can't stop.

And guess what?

Tonight we have a special treat (twist)! It is the peak of the annual Perseid Meteor Shower. The event is the remnants of the Swift-Tuttle Comet that passed our (earth's) way many, many years ago. However, this time every year the orbit of the earth passes through the "debris" left by the comet and gives us an awesome display we call a meteor shower! The full moon tonight may hinder the visibility of these shooting stars which can flood the sky at up to 100 meteors every hour! It may be worth a stop along the way back to catch a star or two.

For all the details check the Rides Calendar at the bottom of this Blogazoidal!

Can't wait! See you then and as always...

See you out on the road,
Bob

Maybe One Exception...

As you can imagine, I get all kinds of requests to post things on the Blogazoidal. Some, to be sure, you would expect, (since we are so worldwide with an audience in the 7 figures...not!), but some things border on the bizarre. You would expect to get a request to post somebody's bike that he wants to sell or maybe a rider that has an issue with a motorist. But, some of the requests I get are just way out there.

For example, a few months back, someone emailed me wanting to know if I would post recommendations for chamois cream applications. Now, I don't know about you, but that's getting kind of personal, don't you think? I mean, something you rub on your hinter regions is a bit of a private matter. Some folks apply the soothing potion to the chamois and others to the hinters themselves...and some may even slather both with the soothing balm.

However, I don't really think it's anybody's business but your own hinters as to your particular preference. And, I for one am not going to take up reader's valuable time posting how, where, what and why I or any other cyclist applies the lubricating lotion upon the hinters. I mean, some folks really rub...

Now wait just a minute! I'm doing the very thing I said I wouldn't do. This Blogazoidal is supposed to be used for the information, (sometimes entertainment), of it's readers who want to know what happened on the last ride or where we meet for the next ride. That's all, right? So no more requests about bar tape or how many rides before I wash my shorts or should I clean my water bottle when there's something black down in there. Okay?

Good, I'm glad we got that settled. And no, we're not listing your old TV for sale either. However...

There are exceptions to almost every rule, so...

Maybe we should talk about the things that affect us all as cyclists. This may be the one divergent from our puritan cycling blogazoidal ways. Things like the new traffic control measures on Langley Ave just east of Pensacourt. This is something that could have serious consequences for any cyclist. In fact, there is a real danger to the rider as he approaches this area. The new control measures push the rider into the traffic lane. It eliminates the bike lane/parking lane from use for the cyclist. This will be sure to irritate motorists as well. And to top it off, there is absolutely no warning that the traffic flow changes whatsoever. This isn't good.

Well, what can we do? Several have already written their council member. Mike Louy has even taken photographs as cyclists are riding by the new obstacles on Langley showing clearly the danger. He sent them to his council member, Ms. DeWeese. Here's her email address: mdeweese@ci.pensacola.fl.us

Maybe send her an email letting her know what you think about the new traffic measures on Langley. Who knows, maybe this will start some kind of "voice" for cyclists that is long overdue in our wonderful city...hope so.


Now, how about those rides this weekend?!

Well, tomorrow morning will we be doing the group fave Twisted Hammock Loop! This 55 miler is a fantastic ride. The shorter group will turn off at Kingsfield and looks like we may hook up again with them at the second rest stop at Pine Forest and 9 Mile Road. The shorter loop is about 45 miles. Pace will be moderate until after the first rest stop. (except for the Hammock Sprint)

Sunday will see the peloton at the beach for the Full Moon Ride. This monthly ride is the all time favorite of our group. Rumor has it that Left Lane may have some adult beverages at the finish line. I'm looking forward to seeing everyone out tomorrow morning! But, until then, I'll...

See you out on the road,
Bob

Several Great Rides This Week

In light of the very sad news of the passing of a fellow cyclist, David Bailey, it seems inappropriate to do our usual color commentary regarding this past weekend's rides. They were wonderful rides to be sure. Saturday's ride had a huge group headed to Innerarity Point and back...with plenty of peloton antics. However, I think we'll forgo this week's Blogification out of respect and just remind you of what's on tap for our group starting tonight.

Tonight at 6pm we'll have our easy paced ride leaving from Firestone and Summit. Tomorrow evening at 5:30pm is our WERAD leaving from the same location. The WERAD is our weekly hammerfest or sufferfest depending on which end of the paceline you happen to be on. This coming weekend will see our peloton on two of the all time favorite routes! Saturday is the infamous Twisted Hammock Loop. Everyone loves this route! And Sunday is, of course the monthly fave Full Moon Ride out on the beach. What a fantastic weekend for riding!

Any questions? Just check out the Rides Calendar at the bottom of the Blogazoidal.

We'll talk soon. But until then, I'll...

See you out on the road,
Bob

Innerarity Point Calls, NAS Beckons

Tomorrow morning we will once again attempt the awesome Innerarity Point Route. This route is a group fave and is around 50 to 55 miles long with alot of variety. However, if 55 miles is a bit too big a plate for your Saturday early morning appetite, then try the shorter route. This week it will be the NAS Back Door Loop which is just under 40 miles.

Both groups will start together from Fish and Wildlife at 7am and will maintain an easy to moderate pace until the shorter route group turns off for NAS. From this point each group will determine the pace for their particular group.

Important Note: If you are in the shorter route group, you must have government issued photo identification (GIPID) to go onboard NAS. No exceptions!

The longer route group will have two rest stops to fill the bottles. Should be home no later than 10:30am+/-. Which ever group you choose, come on out and get in some miles! Only 7 weeks until the Pensacola Cycling Classic!!!

See you in the morning and as always...

See you out on the road,
Bob

Wonderful WERAD Wast Wight...

...you wascally wabbit. (I'm using my best Elmer Fudd accent here) Because last night's WERAD was a cartoon. Plenty of comic relief.

Good group as we headed out on the Super Figure 8. It was hot to be sure, but not awful. The group pretty much stayed together until the Crit Loop when the boys cranked it up a bit. Seems there was a carrot they were chasing. It was...

Wait just a minute! My custom Blogazoidalizer has a ticker running at the bottom that only the Blogazoider can view as he is uh, blogazoiding. This ticker runs continuously as I write keeping me up to date with the latest breaking news. I receive the news minutes before it breaks to the news agencies around the globe. Just now...hold the phone...this is astounding!

The rides officials have handed down two remarkable decisions regarding last Saturday's controversial ride. I can't believe my eyes as I am reading this! But, apparently they have, for the first time ever, heard the united voice of the riders and handed down a decision in the riders favor. Wait just a minute...

I'm reading this as it comes across on my latest version of iTicker.

Yes! They have decided to remove the new software Pull-O-Meter (POM) from use on future rides! This program measured the time each rider spent at the front pulling the peloton. Evidently, they agreed that it was in fact micro-managing the group, just as the riders complained. This is a great victory for the riders! Certainly a day of rejoicing will ensue! There will no doubt be dancing in the streets of Anaerobiaville tonight! Certainly the bubbly will be flowing at Left Lane's house today. (Why should today be different then any other day?!) The developers of the POM, Phillips, Oliver and Matthews or POM, (thus the POM POM) could not be reached for comment.

Wow, no more POM POM award! This is remarkable news. Seems that the only winner ever is Ranoldo. What a unique distinction; the only wearer of the POM POM! When reached for comment and asked about the unprecedented decision, Ranoldo exclaimed, "Bummer!" Then after a few seconds expressed, "I am very proud to be the sole holder of the POM POMs. This is a great honor and I will try to live by example to my fellow riders."

Wait just a moment...here's comes the other decision...

Katie bar the door!!! They have handed down a verdict that has got to be seen as a very strong discouragement against the practice of Scofflawism within the peloton! They have decided against the Left Lane's appeal and will keep all the hidden cameras in place and in full use! They have even authorized their further use by implementing several more locations. (The locations however, are kept secret...uh, they are HIDDEN cameras.) I'm sure this amazing declaration by the ride officials will be met with mixed reviews by the riders. A few, to be sure, were in favor of the Rule of Scofflaw or ROS within the peloton. None more than the appealer himself, who uses ROS for all his breakaways. Perhaps not as many bubblies will be flowing tonight? (Well, probably, after all, it is the Left Lane.)

Unbestinkinglievable! Two most remarkable decisions handed down within the same day. Does this mark a more rider friendly officials committee? Does this mean the end of Scofflawism as we know it? Will it have to go even further underground? Only time will tell. I'm sure some of the scofflawyers are looking for loopholes already. (Why should they be...ah, never mind.)

Well, with that earth breaking news, who can even remember what happened on last night's WERAD?! Other than, Lawman won the sprint with the Big Hogie second and Crusher taking the bronze! Congrats to the winners!!! The Big Pull Bull award (no more POM POM) goes to Keith "Big Motor" Irwin!

Whew, what a day!!! Wonder what's on tap at the next stage hosting the cast of usual characters? We shall soon find out...less than 48 hours until we head out on the Saturday morning ride. This week we will start out together from Fish and Wildlife at 7am for the Innerarity Point route. The shorter route group will turn off at NAS for the NAS Back Door Loop. Both are great loops! The longer is about 50 or so miles and the shorter is just under 40 miles. Take your pick...just get out and ride!

Man, what a week...

See you out on the road,
Bob

More Controversies!

The controversies rage on just like an angry peloton heading for the finish line on top of a mountain...one attack after another! Evidently, as indicated in the previous post, not all the riders are pleased with this new Pull-O-Meter technology. There are even comments regarding it's use in future Firestone and Summit rides. Several riders have expressed they don't like the "control freak" nature of the software stating they feel micro-managed. Others have refused to ever come to the front of the peloton for fear that they may be labeled a POM POM grabber. This new implementation of cutting edge technology has the entire peloton in an uproar and has caused the ride officials to call an emergency meeting. The results of which will be published here as soon as they become available. But, until then...

Back to live action:

The new Northwest Passage Loop was in fact a huge hit with the riders. The only complaint voiced to this point is it's a bit too short. Not to worry, the ride committee has created two other loops incorporating established routes and the NPL therefore bringing into being the Twisted Northwest Passage Loop or TNPL. We'll try one out in the near future.

Other than that one comment, the ride was fantastic. Great roads and a great group of riders. However, more controversy reared it's ugly head on the way back. It appears that Left Lane is claiming victory in the final sprint. However, some of the more prominent among us have cried foul. Here's the meat of the matter; Left Lane surged ahead on Johnston as the peloton was waiting for a few of the stragglers. He then gained an almost four minute advantage over the peloton in the final kilometers. This is almost unheard of. His accusers assert that he must have run through several red lights where the peloton had to stop. He vehemently argues that he did not violate one traffic law on his way to victory.

In fact here is his testimony in his own words:

The Left Lane is BACK!!!! Group had a most excellent ride Saturday with around 17 riders in all. The Northwest Passage loop was a really nice loop if a little short though. Only around 35 miles or so but with my ride to and from the house I ended up with around 43 miles.

Anyway the new bike is paying dividends. Takes much less effort to hold the pace line and also much better going up hills. Although I struggled a little going up the longest hill of the day I was able to catch back up quickly and stayed with the leaders the whole ride until the Left Lane Broke Away!!! Coming out of Fox Run and crossing 9 mile road on Airport I took the pull not going very fast at all but after the downhill leading up to Johnson I had opened up a little gap on the peloton which was taking it easy, as I turned onto Johnson Avenue. I was still not riding hard and not planning a breakaway but as the gap I had got a little bigger and feeling good I decided to slam it down as I turned onto the stretch of Johnson at Jernigan that has the nice downhill then the uphill leading up to the cemetery.

Seeing that I had a considerable gap, as I am sure the peloton was organizing to chase, I kept riding hard and timed all the lights crossing University and Davis and opened quite a gap. I kept riding hard knowing that the boys don’t like to get beat by a breakaway. But this day the Left Lane prevailed getting in at Maygarden & Summitt ahead of the charging group. As I turned around heading back to the finish line Bob & Nathan were rolling in around only a ½ minute or so behind me. I yelled “nice second place” to the Vortex as he rolled up barely nipping Nathan. Hey, when you’re a 56 year old fat man with bad knees, you have take your little victories where you can!!

As I found out later Fishbone and 1 other rider (can’t remember who) had chased me but could not catch up and were spanked by the peloton as they were reeled in on Maygarden. There was talk of relegating the Left Lane for his usual flaunting of the traffic laws but none were needed this day. A good clean breakaway victory…besides no one was close enough to prove that I had ignored any such rules of the road. It’s kind of like that old saying…”If a tree falls in the forest and no one is there to here it… did it really fall?”. Just another chapter to add to the Legend of the Left Lane!!

That's his side of the story...

Well, the ride officials have been requested by several of the "Heads of State" to review the video from the hidden cameras at the 5 intersections that Left Lane had to pass on his way to the alleged victory. Upon hearing their request, Left Lane exclaimed in anger, "That's Bogus man!" This was met with no small amount of suspicion from the ride officials wondering if, in fact, he had something to hide. This heightened Left Lane's consternation causing him to question the officials integrity. "I didn't see any stinking hidden cameras!", he barked at one reporter covering the story. Uh...that's because they're hidden!

Upon further review, it was discovered that the Left Lane had slowed, but not stopped at all five of the traffic lights. Two of the lights were green as he approached, one was yellow but two were actually red! The official decision was that he will not be relegated! However, he will be penalized 20 seconds for each red light he violated, therefore incurring a 40 second fine. The peloton came across the line 37 seconds behind Left Lane. With his 40 second penalty he now occupies a solid 3rd place behind Vortex and Nathan the Great-than.

When hearing this news, Left Lane demanded to see the tapes himself. However, to his disbelief, the ride officials had already destroyed them stated officially, "We don't want to spike the ball."

Ah yes, yet another controversy rages on within the humble peloton know only as the cast of unusual characters of The Firestone and Summit Group.

As a follow up, this reporter has learned that the Left Lane is appealing the decision demanding that, "Where there is no evidence there is no crime!" (He keeps mumbling something about a tree falling in the woods...)

Well, if you missed that ride...bummer! But, don't get too down on yourself, there's another ride tonight and tomorrow evening as well. And, I'm sure there will be plenty on antics to go around for all. So come on out and enjoy a ride on the F&S Express. (Check the Rides Calendar for all scheduled departures times) Until then, I'll...

See you out on the road,

Bob