Great Rides This Past Weekend

This past weekend we had two great rides. On Saturday, the group did one of our all time favorites, The Twisted Hammock. We started out under sunny skies with a smaller than normal peloton. Although small, it got even smaller once we hit Beulah. Four of the original eleven turned back stating varying reasons. The surviving seven soldiered onward into the Hammock. (It's much easier to get into the hammock than it is to get out.) Crusher and Danamal were later overheard to say the pace was disappointingly slow. So, Crusher took up the gantlet and pushed the pace until about 1k to go. Then Aero Jim Britnell who was looking fitter than ever led the group to the line in a blistering pace. The Hammock Sprint was won by the Vortex who dedicated the victory to the MIA Gianni Bugno. Evidently, Aero wasn't getting enough exercise, because he was seen by the group riding back down into the Hammock as they rode out of the Hammock. Whaaat?!

The Bad Mayonnaise, Doug "The Devastator" Gehman and others took the shorter route after the first rest stop while Crusher and the Vortex opted for the longer miles. All were back together at the second rest stop just in time for the Vortex to be assaulted by an old crusty curmudgeon masquerading as a retired Marine. Crusher almost, uh...crushed the cranky codger as the other six riders circled ready for a throw down with a hapless has-been. It wasn't a pretty scene. (We still aren't sure what the, uhhh...gentleman's issue was. Maybe he was having another bad day. Maybe he just hates life.) Regardless, we headed down the road without incident...thankfully!

We rolled on around to Maygarden and back to the start line. Great ride! I had 61 miles as I was pulling into the garage.

Sunday was the Full Moon Ride. And want a fantastic ride it was! We had close to 20 riders of all talents and abilities. The sunset on the way out to the Fort was gorgeous as advertized. The Full Moon was equally beautiful over the Gulf for the ride back. Bad news though: Not a single meteor spotted. We even stopped along the way back hoping to see a couple of the shooting starts...nada. (That's Spanish...means nothing.) We did have two flats though. Wheelmen Matt flatted just before the second campground on the way back. We all stopped. As we are waiting, a couple of the more talented brethren amongst us began singing tunes from the 70s and 80s. At one point, one of the wannabe rockstars hit a high note and Chris Norton's front tire blew!!! That's right, while she was just standing there in flatted! The fans went wild!

Semper Cy, being the good kind of Marine, (is there any other? Uh, read story above) repaired it quickly and just in time as the fixers of Matt's flat showed up. The group, now all back together headed for home with no other events to share in this report. Great ride!!!

And speaking of great rides...tonight is the WERAD! That's right, 5:30pm at Firestone and Summit. Come on out! It looks to be a beautiful evening! See you then! And...

See you out on the road,
Bob

Full Moon Ride Tonight...with a Twist!

Just a quick note to remind everyone riding tonight on the beautiful Full Moon Ride; please remember to bring $3 for entrance into the Fort Pickens National Park. We usually have enough annual pass holders to get everyone in "free" however sometimes we don't and you may need to pay for yourself. Also, please bring your lights! There are very few cars on Fort Pickens Road at night, but there are a few. Lights are a must. They don't have to be the big fancy, light up a stadium type, but just something on the front and rear of your machine to let others know where you are.

We start as promptly as possible at 7pm tonight and ride to the Fort as the sun is setting. We have a few minutes to regroup at the Fort before heading back under the gorgeous full moon over the Gulf! This is a fantastic ride and one that everybody does more than once! (kinda like Lay's potato chips) you just can't stop.

And guess what?

Tonight we have a special treat (twist)! It is the peak of the annual Perseid Meteor Shower. The event is the remnants of the Swift-Tuttle Comet that passed our (earth's) way many, many years ago. However, this time every year the orbit of the earth passes through the "debris" left by the comet and gives us an awesome display we call a meteor shower! The full moon tonight may hinder the visibility of these shooting stars which can flood the sky at up to 100 meteors every hour! It may be worth a stop along the way back to catch a star or two.

For all the details check the Rides Calendar at the bottom of this Blogazoidal!

Can't wait! See you then and as always...

See you out on the road,
Bob

Maybe One Exception...

As you can imagine, I get all kinds of requests to post things on the Blogazoidal. Some, to be sure, you would expect, (since we are so worldwide with an audience in the 7 figures...not!), but some things border on the bizarre. You would expect to get a request to post somebody's bike that he wants to sell or maybe a rider that has an issue with a motorist. But, some of the requests I get are just way out there.

For example, a few months back, someone emailed me wanting to know if I would post recommendations for chamois cream applications. Now, I don't know about you, but that's getting kind of personal, don't you think? I mean, something you rub on your hinter regions is a bit of a private matter. Some folks apply the soothing potion to the chamois and others to the hinters themselves...and some may even slather both with the soothing balm.

However, I don't really think it's anybody's business but your own hinters as to your particular preference. And, I for one am not going to take up reader's valuable time posting how, where, what and why I or any other cyclist applies the lubricating lotion upon the hinters. I mean, some folks really rub...

Now wait just a minute! I'm doing the very thing I said I wouldn't do. This Blogazoidal is supposed to be used for the information, (sometimes entertainment), of it's readers who want to know what happened on the last ride or where we meet for the next ride. That's all, right? So no more requests about bar tape or how many rides before I wash my shorts or should I clean my water bottle when there's something black down in there. Okay?

Good, I'm glad we got that settled. And no, we're not listing your old TV for sale either. However...

There are exceptions to almost every rule, so...

Maybe we should talk about the things that affect us all as cyclists. This may be the one divergent from our puritan cycling blogazoidal ways. Things like the new traffic control measures on Langley Ave just east of Pensacourt. This is something that could have serious consequences for any cyclist. In fact, there is a real danger to the rider as he approaches this area. The new control measures push the rider into the traffic lane. It eliminates the bike lane/parking lane from use for the cyclist. This will be sure to irritate motorists as well. And to top it off, there is absolutely no warning that the traffic flow changes whatsoever. This isn't good.

Well, what can we do? Several have already written their council member. Mike Louy has even taken photographs as cyclists are riding by the new obstacles on Langley showing clearly the danger. He sent them to his council member, Ms. DeWeese. Here's her email address: mdeweese@ci.pensacola.fl.us

Maybe send her an email letting her know what you think about the new traffic measures on Langley. Who knows, maybe this will start some kind of "voice" for cyclists that is long overdue in our wonderful city...hope so.


Now, how about those rides this weekend?!

Well, tomorrow morning will we be doing the group fave Twisted Hammock Loop! This 55 miler is a fantastic ride. The shorter group will turn off at Kingsfield and looks like we may hook up again with them at the second rest stop at Pine Forest and 9 Mile Road. The shorter loop is about 45 miles. Pace will be moderate until after the first rest stop. (except for the Hammock Sprint)

Sunday will see the peloton at the beach for the Full Moon Ride. This monthly ride is the all time favorite of our group. Rumor has it that Left Lane may have some adult beverages at the finish line. I'm looking forward to seeing everyone out tomorrow morning! But, until then, I'll...

See you out on the road,
Bob

Several Great Rides This Week

In light of the very sad news of the passing of a fellow cyclist, David Bailey, it seems inappropriate to do our usual color commentary regarding this past weekend's rides. They were wonderful rides to be sure. Saturday's ride had a huge group headed to Innerarity Point and back...with plenty of peloton antics. However, I think we'll forgo this week's Blogification out of respect and just remind you of what's on tap for our group starting tonight.

Tonight at 6pm we'll have our easy paced ride leaving from Firestone and Summit. Tomorrow evening at 5:30pm is our WERAD leaving from the same location. The WERAD is our weekly hammerfest or sufferfest depending on which end of the paceline you happen to be on. This coming weekend will see our peloton on two of the all time favorite routes! Saturday is the infamous Twisted Hammock Loop. Everyone loves this route! And Sunday is, of course the monthly fave Full Moon Ride out on the beach. What a fantastic weekend for riding!

Any questions? Just check out the Rides Calendar at the bottom of the Blogazoidal.

We'll talk soon. But until then, I'll...

See you out on the road,
Bob

Innerarity Point Calls, NAS Beckons

Tomorrow morning we will once again attempt the awesome Innerarity Point Route. This route is a group fave and is around 50 to 55 miles long with alot of variety. However, if 55 miles is a bit too big a plate for your Saturday early morning appetite, then try the shorter route. This week it will be the NAS Back Door Loop which is just under 40 miles.

Both groups will start together from Fish and Wildlife at 7am and will maintain an easy to moderate pace until the shorter route group turns off for NAS. From this point each group will determine the pace for their particular group.

Important Note: If you are in the shorter route group, you must have government issued photo identification (GIPID) to go onboard NAS. No exceptions!

The longer route group will have two rest stops to fill the bottles. Should be home no later than 10:30am+/-. Which ever group you choose, come on out and get in some miles! Only 7 weeks until the Pensacola Cycling Classic!!!

See you in the morning and as always...

See you out on the road,
Bob

Wonderful WERAD Wast Wight...

...you wascally wabbit. (I'm using my best Elmer Fudd accent here) Because last night's WERAD was a cartoon. Plenty of comic relief.

Good group as we headed out on the Super Figure 8. It was hot to be sure, but not awful. The group pretty much stayed together until the Crit Loop when the boys cranked it up a bit. Seems there was a carrot they were chasing. It was...

Wait just a minute! My custom Blogazoidalizer has a ticker running at the bottom that only the Blogazoider can view as he is uh, blogazoiding. This ticker runs continuously as I write keeping me up to date with the latest breaking news. I receive the news minutes before it breaks to the news agencies around the globe. Just now...hold the phone...this is astounding!

The rides officials have handed down two remarkable decisions regarding last Saturday's controversial ride. I can't believe my eyes as I am reading this! But, apparently they have, for the first time ever, heard the united voice of the riders and handed down a decision in the riders favor. Wait just a minute...

I'm reading this as it comes across on my latest version of iTicker.

Yes! They have decided to remove the new software Pull-O-Meter (POM) from use on future rides! This program measured the time each rider spent at the front pulling the peloton. Evidently, they agreed that it was in fact micro-managing the group, just as the riders complained. This is a great victory for the riders! Certainly a day of rejoicing will ensue! There will no doubt be dancing in the streets of Anaerobiaville tonight! Certainly the bubbly will be flowing at Left Lane's house today. (Why should today be different then any other day?!) The developers of the POM, Phillips, Oliver and Matthews or POM, (thus the POM POM) could not be reached for comment.

Wow, no more POM POM award! This is remarkable news. Seems that the only winner ever is Ranoldo. What a unique distinction; the only wearer of the POM POM! When reached for comment and asked about the unprecedented decision, Ranoldo exclaimed, "Bummer!" Then after a few seconds expressed, "I am very proud to be the sole holder of the POM POMs. This is a great honor and I will try to live by example to my fellow riders."

Wait just a moment...here's comes the other decision...

Katie bar the door!!! They have handed down a verdict that has got to be seen as a very strong discouragement against the practice of Scofflawism within the peloton! They have decided against the Left Lane's appeal and will keep all the hidden cameras in place and in full use! They have even authorized their further use by implementing several more locations. (The locations however, are kept secret...uh, they are HIDDEN cameras.) I'm sure this amazing declaration by the ride officials will be met with mixed reviews by the riders. A few, to be sure, were in favor of the Rule of Scofflaw or ROS within the peloton. None more than the appealer himself, who uses ROS for all his breakaways. Perhaps not as many bubblies will be flowing tonight? (Well, probably, after all, it is the Left Lane.)

Unbestinkinglievable! Two most remarkable decisions handed down within the same day. Does this mark a more rider friendly officials committee? Does this mean the end of Scofflawism as we know it? Will it have to go even further underground? Only time will tell. I'm sure some of the scofflawyers are looking for loopholes already. (Why should they be...ah, never mind.)

Well, with that earth breaking news, who can even remember what happened on last night's WERAD?! Other than, Lawman won the sprint with the Big Hogie second and Crusher taking the bronze! Congrats to the winners!!! The Big Pull Bull award (no more POM POM) goes to Keith "Big Motor" Irwin!

Whew, what a day!!! Wonder what's on tap at the next stage hosting the cast of usual characters? We shall soon find out...less than 48 hours until we head out on the Saturday morning ride. This week we will start out together from Fish and Wildlife at 7am for the Innerarity Point route. The shorter route group will turn off at NAS for the NAS Back Door Loop. Both are great loops! The longer is about 50 or so miles and the shorter is just under 40 miles. Take your pick...just get out and ride!

Man, what a week...

See you out on the road,
Bob

More Controversies!

The controversies rage on just like an angry peloton heading for the finish line on top of a mountain...one attack after another! Evidently, as indicated in the previous post, not all the riders are pleased with this new Pull-O-Meter technology. There are even comments regarding it's use in future Firestone and Summit rides. Several riders have expressed they don't like the "control freak" nature of the software stating they feel micro-managed. Others have refused to ever come to the front of the peloton for fear that they may be labeled a POM POM grabber. This new implementation of cutting edge technology has the entire peloton in an uproar and has caused the ride officials to call an emergency meeting. The results of which will be published here as soon as they become available. But, until then...

Back to live action:

The new Northwest Passage Loop was in fact a huge hit with the riders. The only complaint voiced to this point is it's a bit too short. Not to worry, the ride committee has created two other loops incorporating established routes and the NPL therefore bringing into being the Twisted Northwest Passage Loop or TNPL. We'll try one out in the near future.

Other than that one comment, the ride was fantastic. Great roads and a great group of riders. However, more controversy reared it's ugly head on the way back. It appears that Left Lane is claiming victory in the final sprint. However, some of the more prominent among us have cried foul. Here's the meat of the matter; Left Lane surged ahead on Johnston as the peloton was waiting for a few of the stragglers. He then gained an almost four minute advantage over the peloton in the final kilometers. This is almost unheard of. His accusers assert that he must have run through several red lights where the peloton had to stop. He vehemently argues that he did not violate one traffic law on his way to victory.

In fact here is his testimony in his own words:

The Left Lane is BACK!!!! Group had a most excellent ride Saturday with around 17 riders in all. The Northwest Passage loop was a really nice loop if a little short though. Only around 35 miles or so but with my ride to and from the house I ended up with around 43 miles.

Anyway the new bike is paying dividends. Takes much less effort to hold the pace line and also much better going up hills. Although I struggled a little going up the longest hill of the day I was able to catch back up quickly and stayed with the leaders the whole ride until the Left Lane Broke Away!!! Coming out of Fox Run and crossing 9 mile road on Airport I took the pull not going very fast at all but after the downhill leading up to Johnson I had opened up a little gap on the peloton which was taking it easy, as I turned onto Johnson Avenue. I was still not riding hard and not planning a breakaway but as the gap I had got a little bigger and feeling good I decided to slam it down as I turned onto the stretch of Johnson at Jernigan that has the nice downhill then the uphill leading up to the cemetery.

Seeing that I had a considerable gap, as I am sure the peloton was organizing to chase, I kept riding hard and timed all the lights crossing University and Davis and opened quite a gap. I kept riding hard knowing that the boys don’t like to get beat by a breakaway. But this day the Left Lane prevailed getting in at Maygarden & Summitt ahead of the charging group. As I turned around heading back to the finish line Bob & Nathan were rolling in around only a ½ minute or so behind me. I yelled “nice second place” to the Vortex as he rolled up barely nipping Nathan. Hey, when you’re a 56 year old fat man with bad knees, you have take your little victories where you can!!

As I found out later Fishbone and 1 other rider (can’t remember who) had chased me but could not catch up and were spanked by the peloton as they were reeled in on Maygarden. There was talk of relegating the Left Lane for his usual flaunting of the traffic laws but none were needed this day. A good clean breakaway victory…besides no one was close enough to prove that I had ignored any such rules of the road. It’s kind of like that old saying…”If a tree falls in the forest and no one is there to here it… did it really fall?”. Just another chapter to add to the Legend of the Left Lane!!

That's his side of the story...

Well, the ride officials have been requested by several of the "Heads of State" to review the video from the hidden cameras at the 5 intersections that Left Lane had to pass on his way to the alleged victory. Upon hearing their request, Left Lane exclaimed in anger, "That's Bogus man!" This was met with no small amount of suspicion from the ride officials wondering if, in fact, he had something to hide. This heightened Left Lane's consternation causing him to question the officials integrity. "I didn't see any stinking hidden cameras!", he barked at one reporter covering the story. Uh...that's because they're hidden!

Upon further review, it was discovered that the Left Lane had slowed, but not stopped at all five of the traffic lights. Two of the lights were green as he approached, one was yellow but two were actually red! The official decision was that he will not be relegated! However, he will be penalized 20 seconds for each red light he violated, therefore incurring a 40 second fine. The peloton came across the line 37 seconds behind Left Lane. With his 40 second penalty he now occupies a solid 3rd place behind Vortex and Nathan the Great-than.

When hearing this news, Left Lane demanded to see the tapes himself. However, to his disbelief, the ride officials had already destroyed them stated officially, "We don't want to spike the ball."

Ah yes, yet another controversy rages on within the humble peloton know only as the cast of unusual characters of The Firestone and Summit Group.

As a follow up, this reporter has learned that the Left Lane is appealing the decision demanding that, "Where there is no evidence there is no crime!" (He keeps mumbling something about a tree falling in the woods...)

Well, if you missed that ride...bummer! But, don't get too down on yourself, there's another ride tonight and tomorrow evening as well. And, I'm sure there will be plenty on antics to go around for all. So come on out and enjoy a ride on the F&S Express. (Check the Rides Calendar for all scheduled departures times) Until then, I'll...

See you out on the road,

Bob